[15466] in APO-L
All Male/Co-Ed Debate
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Jodie Kahn)
Mon Nov 11 18:42:22 1996
Date: Mon, 11 Nov 1996 18:41:22 -0500
Reply-To: Jodie Kahn <jodie@WALRUS.COM>
From: Jodie Kahn <jodie@WALRUS.COM>
To: Multiple recipients of list APO-L <APO-L@VM.CC.PURDUE.EDU>
You haven't gotten a clear explanation because its hard to give. An AllMale
chapter's brothers have a different type of organization than the coed ones
do. Now, I'm not saying that coed chapters don't have intense brotherhood,
indeed, I feel great brotherhood with many female brothers. Some of the
ones on this list in fact. It's something about sharing a connection with
these other guys that makes being in an AllMale chapter special. Trying to
explain it is just difficult.
I would like to try to give you my feelings about all male chapters.
I first met several at CPW. After the convention I ended up going on
a rafting trip with several meembers of Delta (Auburn). I was stuck
in a boat for 6 hours with 8 guys from the chapter. We spent the
entire rafting trip disucssing APO. I learned alot about the chapter
that weekend but still wasn't convince that chapters should be
allowed to be co-ed.
Over the next year, I got to spend time with other all-male chapters. I
attended Gamma Lambda's (Clemson) 50th Anniversary Party where I was
able to learrm more about their chapter, and the service sorority that
is affliated with APO there. Many of the women were a bit confused
about a female brother, but were very happy with their arrangement.
They had their own group of sisterhood and did project with APO
Over the next few years, I spent time at Auburn attending projects and
their sweetheart ball. When you ask about what kinds of traditions all
male-chapters have, ask Auburn about their sweetheart program. Breifly,
all the different sororites and dorms submit a candidate to be APO's
sweetheart. They choose 5 finalists and have a formal to announce the
winner. The girl who is the choosen is there for the pledges. She works
with them, does service projects with the chapter and even attend attends
pledge and brother meetings.
If all-male chapters were forced to go co-ed what would happen to this
wonderful Auburn tradition. One that the school and the fraternity both
enjoy. I can't explain other traditions they have, I would recommend
attending one of their sweetheart balls, or chapter projects. You will see
what it is like there. By the way. I think some all-male chapters do
more service than half the co-ed chapters. So don't think the
brothers joined just to hang out with their friends.
I have also spent time at the UDEl chapter. They were alot of fun. In
terms of tradition, I can't tell you any in particular, but it is the way
the chapter runs. The closeness and brotherhoood that is in the air.
In many coed chapters, dating between brothers can be a prolem that hurts
the chapters. It is not present in all-male chapters. I am not saying
that chapters shouldn't be co-ed. All that I am saying is let these
chapters exist.
Do you know how it is different if you are hanging out with a group of
same sex friends as opposed to to a co-ed group. The feeling in the air
is different. Why take this away from them. Many of the campuses don't
have a problem with them being all male.
I learned the true meaning of brotherhoood from a member of an all male
chapter. I was really rough time. One brother called to say hello. He
could tell I was upset and was trying to get me to talk about it. I
didn't want to waste his time. His remark to me "You are more than just
a friend, you are one of my brothers." From this day on, I saw
brotherhood differently. I understood it better. He didn't care that I
was female, to him I his brother. THAT ALL?
Sorry about all the rambling. Just trying to explain. From the list
posted by Randy Finder, It seems that every region (or almost) has at
least one all-male chapter. Before you dcecide on this issue. Attend a
service project with them. Go to one of their parties. See for yourself
what it is like.
Jodie Kahn
Delta Kappa Alumni
Emory Univeristy
Section 97 Staff
President, New York Metro Alumni Association.
Everything stated above is my own opinion and personal experiences.
Thank you for reading this far.
