[16092] in APO-L
Nothing Pertinent... Just thinking...
daemon@ATHENA.MIT.EDU (Janson S. Jones)
Sun Jan 26 06:22:17 1997
Date: Sun, 26 Jan 1997 06:20:22 -0500
Reply-To: Janson73@AOL.COM
From: "Janson S. Jones" <Janson73@AOL.COM>
To: Multiple recipients of list APO-L <APO-L@VM.CC.PURDUE.EDU>
It's about five in the morning, here in Norman, Oklahoma, Cental Time. I
just woke up from a long day of consuming mass quantities yesterday. I
didn't make it very far into the night. If I were to choose a word to
describe my emotional state lately, it would have to be meloncholy. But
melancholy is an odd feeling. Why is it that often it seems we feel the most
alive when we feel the worst? Sometimes, it seems I feed myself with
self-inflicting emotions just to feel alive. Anyhow, I woke up fifteen
minutes ago from restless sleep. Now, I'm sitting here at my computer,
listening to Jimmy Buffett's A Pirate Looks at Fourty, and typing on the
computer. I still have a lot of work I want to finish by Wednesday, the day
of our first Informational Meeting for Spring Rush. I also want to finish
writing out my plan for the pledge program for the semester. Why is it I
work the most efficiently when I'm feeling a bit depressed? I'm not sure. I
can hear the wind outside rustling through the trees. I can smell humidity
in the air. I think about when it will be warm enough for me to walk around
in shorts and Tivas. I think about when I will be able to swim in the clear
waters of the Florida Keys. I think about when I will finally mature and get
over these violent mood swings. I think about graduating in less than a
year. I think about where I'll be in ten years. These ideas dart through my
mind, like cars on an expressway. But I don't concentrate on them... Only
long enough to have typed them down on this Freewrite. For now, I will work
on the pledge program. My classes are going well and for the first time in
my undergraduate career, I feel like a real college student. Alpha Phi Omega
is going to be great this semester. A lot of things are going well in my
life... Yet, this melancholy persists... Another long night... Or another
cold morning... Soon, the sun will rise... And hopefully as the dawn breaks
through my window as I continue writing, my melancholy will melt away,
leaving me fresh and new, like a flower rising in the Morning Spring dew.
-Janson, who is having one hell of a long night!
